Chasing the sun

I know, I know, there is a already a catchy song titled "Chasing the sun" and it is now stuck in my head (and hopefully yours too!) for at least the next 3 days. You are welcome!

Earlier this year, my friends invited my to start a square foot garden in their backyard and I said yes. I have never grown anything, mind you; my attempts at growing indoor plants a few years ago convinced me that I am definitely not gifted with nurturing vegetation. Anyway, I knew I could not pass up this second chance; besides, it was my friends' first attempt at a garden, so I did not feel too intimidated. We spent the past few Mondays working on our boxes, getting plants, wood, seeds, soil, mulch... and pretty gardening gloves for me (hey, why not!). We were all set to start planting our garden last week, when we were advised to wait until at least May 1st...  So, we are patiently waiting for the next step.

In the meantime, I bought a sunflower growing kit (one of my favorite flowers) and decided to try not to kill it. I did great the first couple of days, and then it happened, I forgot to water it for a whole week. By the time I remembered, I was ready to throw it away and set up a daily reminder on my phone to water the future plants in my friends' yard. To my delight, when I looked at the window, I was relieved to notice that it was not dead...Phew! After faithfully watering it for the past week, I took this picture yesterday evening.

Chasing the sun

I was speechless.... I am not quite sure how Marie Marguerite-or Maggie for short- (that's my flower's name) survived, but I am more intrigued by the way she kept purposely, longingly, and steadfastly chasing the sun. I am amazed at the determination it took her to stay alive despite my best attempts to forget about her. It made me realize that I want to be more like her... focused on chasing the sun, focused on chasing my purpose, focused on chasing nourishment for my soul. Sure, there will be dry seasons, sure there will be obstacles, sure there will be closed doors, but I have a feeling that as long as I keep chasing the sun, everything will be A-OK! 

Thank you for your lesson, Maggie. I promise not to forget about you...

Taking part, 

eed,

Scar

Do you sometimes stare at a object, or a person and end up getting lost in whatever feelings they inspire? I do... I often do. I was sitting  on a park bench earlier this evening, and kept staring at a crack on the pavement completely mesmerized. 

                                       

It reminded me of a few lines I wrote in my journal earlier in the day that read:

" Sealed, my heart is sealed. It has been made new again."

For some reason, I kept trying to imagine this little perfect image of what a restored heart looks like, and it just did not feel right. I knew there had to be more to these words than the idea that somehow my heart would magically be free of scars and various bumps. When I saw the crack in the pavement... I knew... I knew it was my heart. The crack was the scar from disappointments, hurts, heartache, loss and pain. It was barely noticeable until I sat down on a bench across from it, with the intention of capturing the sun before it set. I walk daily around  many people (including myself) who carry scars, and pretend  they are not there. It felt really good to acknowledge that this scar, no matter how small or gnarly is truly becoming a part of me, but it does not have to define who I am.  

After all, the crack is on still solid ground...still standing, still beating, still searching, still experiencing, still taking risks. That's a good sign, isn't it?

eed

Introduction (Part 2): HE blessed me

My middle name: Eyram, (also known as Erm by close friends) means: HE blessed me. He being God.

My favorite lyrics in Jason Mraz's album "L.O.V.E" are the following:

"I am hoping that you noticed how you are blessed..."

I think those lyrics speak to me, more than the rest of the song because they describe where I am at this precise point in my life. I can't deny that I want more, because I do. I don't want more things, I really don't care much about material things (although, I do LOVE getting my hands on a great pair of running shoes), but I want more... more adventure, more passion, more experiences...more.

Trying to apply these lyrics to my life proved to be a harder exercise than I first realized. Mostly because it meant looking past the disappointments  the ambition and goals I have set for myself and focus on a sense of contentment that can sometime be as volatile as my good intentions. Earlier this year, I decided to take a daily count of 3 blessings... sadly that did not last very long... Looking back, I realize that forcing myself to feel content was not the purpose of the exercise. I actually wrote: "I am thankful for the internet". Haha!

Thankfully, I realized pretty quickly that noticing my blessings had to become a more organic part of my life. So instead of listing them daily, I "created" an inspiration jar. Every time something cool happens, or I get some encouragement from friends or strangers, I take the time to write them down and put them in my inspiration jar.

My inspiration jar

                                         

One particular hard day this past month, I closed my eyes and picked a note I wrote before an important meeting, and it said something like: "You are starting a new and exciting journey". As cheesy as it sounds, it was exactly the inspiration I needed to get me through the day. It may be something small, but when I take the time to remember to notice how I am blessed, it changes my perspective on what faces me and my attitude usually (slowly) follows suit.

Taking part, 

eed